Not so Easy Riding

Being a man of many talents, I'm now learning how to ride a motorcycle... oh, and a car too.

The whole process of getting a license is long and boring, but the whole driving part can be fun. It should be noted that riding a bike is about 10 times more fun than a car, and a lot less boring. You can speed up faster, stop faster and even have fun in the middle of traffic. Even driving at low speeds beats the hell out of having to wait in traffic as come woman or old man decide on where they're going!

The problem with driving is, as with most thing in life, other people. In the few classes I've took, I've had people try to pass me and almost hitting a truck in the process, some woman getting out of a parking space at quite some speed without signaling it (oh, I should note that the parking space was in front of the school where she picked up her kid), a guy passing me because I was slowing down due to a red light (and then he had to wait with half his car out of the lane) and about a ton of old people and women driving. Oh, by the way, I can mock women drivers whenever I want. I mean, when a guy who has never driven a car can get pissed at some bitch because she's driving slow...

But back at the fun part. Driving a bike can be fun, specially when your instructor let's you cruise at 90 km/h (56 mph) on your first lesson, even though you haven't driven before and the bike you're on is giving it all she's got, captain. Of course, people still will pretend they don't see you, push you to the edge of the lane, cut in front of you like madmen (ok, sometimes they got right of passage. Doesn't mean they have to speed up to get in front of ya... and stop at a red light just after that) and pretty much pretend you're driving a bicycle. Still, it's nice to see the look on their faces when you just decide to pull the throttle and leave them behind, stuck in traffic.

As soon as I really learn how to ride that thing, I'm gonna write something about it. For now, I'm taking it slow (they won't let me ride the big bike yet. I've had about 5 lessons, I know how to ride that shit now. Fuckers.) and learning the ropes!

Keep on working, millions on welfare depend on you!

Had to do some form-filling the other day over at the social security office.

I generally consider myself to be an ok guy... ok, I'm stretching the truth here, I know I'm an evil bastard who hates everybody and doesn't give a fuck any other way, but play along for a little while. So, being a nice-ish guy, I agree with the whole be a good citizen philosophy... up to a point, and I really think people shouldn't commit fiscal fraud. We need taxes to build stuff to be used by everyone. We like having street lights, a decent health care system, not too much garbage on our streets and the like. As such, makes some sense that we, the ones who use those services and commodities, pay for them. Sure, most of that money is gonna be detoured into some corrupt politician's pocket or a corrupt politician's contractor friend and such. But hey, the world is a corrupt place. You'd probably steal some for yourself too, given the chance. Bad you!

Then there's the social security system. A democracy is based on the principle that everybody's equal. That's a principle that some brave men fought for long ago. All men are equal. Well, granted, at the time, all men didn't include immigrants, black people, other such minorities and women. But you get the idea. Back on track, the point is that the system was designed so that people who had nothing could have a chance to get back on tracks, clean up and be a part of society. If they also made a clause that, if you stayed a useless piece of trash, you'd get shot, the system would be perfect.Oh, and also something about retirement plans and unemployment funds.

If everyone played by the rules, it's be a sweet idea. The problem is that, walking into a social security office is akin to swimming with leaches, you are surrounded by parasites. I'm always remembered of a childhood friend of mine's life story. Thus far, ever since he started working, at around 16 y.o., his life's been a cycle of working for a year and a half (minimum time to collect unemployment fund) and receiving said fund for the maximum time possible. I'm inclined to believe he's not the only one doing it. Maybe.

They say most people wouldn't work, given the option. Recently, I'm inclined to join that group of people. Every time I look at my paycheck and check the amount allocated to soc sec discounts, remember that, by the time I come around to be entitled to a pension, after busting my ass all my life (pushing computer keys is hard work, believe you me), the social security will probably have gone bust a long while ago. Every time I walk by some coffee shop, filled with the same guys that each day just sit there, smoking and boozing on beer, and I think about where they get the money, I feel less compelled to be a good citizen. Every time I see someone who lost their jobs starving in the street 'cause they lost their job, all the while someone in full health, with a nice house and a good car collects on welfare, just to lazy around all day, I just feel like laughing at the hypocrisy and bullshit of it all.

At least I get to laugh all the way to work!

No YouTube in Brazil?

Apparently a brazilian court demanded that youtube should be blocked in Brazil.

According to Reuters, "Daniela Cicarelli, a model and ex-wife of soccer great Ronaldo, sued YouTube after a video of her apparently having sex in shallow water on a beach with her boyfriend was posted to the site". Ok, so some ho got taped or taped herself fucking. Dunno which haven't seen it. If I want porn, I go for porn, not some attention whore "apparently" having sex on tape... although I have seen that Paris Hilton video, but that's another story.

So, as attention whores generally do, she goes ans sues someone. Gets media attention. Ok, so now she's sueding because she fucked a guy on a beach. Because, she fucked a guy on a wide open space. Isn't that called "indecent exposure" and such? Oh wait, pseudo-celebrity.

No one gives a fuck, specially 'cause people kept uploading it. So what does the bitch do? " The case dragged on for several months before they filed a third suit in December requesting that YouTube be shut down as long as the video is available to users". That's right, sued to having one of the biggest sites on the series of tubes shut down. This would be hilarious if they hadn't taken her seriously and issues an order to have the site blocked (wonder why they didn't just shut it down...).

Luckily, that court order was nullified afterwards. The point here is that, if you fuck someone on a beach and get caught on tape, you can sue... I don't know, Microsoft. Maybe Sony, 'cause they made the camera. And you don't get charged with anything for humping some fuck on the sand. Oh, wait, you have to be a celebrity.

Oh, on a historic note, "Last year, a Brazilian court demanded Google disclose data on local users of its social networking site Orkut who had pages with content supporting racism or child pornography. Google took down some of those Orkut pages but has said that under U.S. law it could not reveal user data".

So, next time you use anything google related, just remember... Big Brother is watching you. Oh, and screw google!

Cellphones as X-mas presents for kids

Every kid wants a mobile phone.

It has become some sort of trend, one that has reached far more epidemic proportions than burning your bra, growing your hair long, getting drugged up and wearing colorful t-shirts. If you ask every kid above the age of three what they want, their reply will almost certainly contain a cellphone somewhere. Probably some specific brand and model too!


I can understand that. I wanted tons of stuff when I was a kid. Everyone wished for something just because everybody else has it. Or even because someone in specific possesses something we think we also want. Even now. Our own place, with a garage to store our BMW, witch we drive to our own company. The difference is, we know there are some things we can't get, some things that are really hard to get. Kids don't. The ask for something, they get it. Like cellphones, for instance.

The first thing that comes to mind is actually a simple question... What the fuck are the kids' parents thinking? I mean, what is a 5... shit, a 13 year old gonna do with a cellphone? Well, he could use it to phone home, and the parents can use it to know where he is. This is because, as everyone knows, kids are responsible enough to use the phone only when they need it and they also never lie about their whereabouts. Oh, and you can reach them anytime in case you need to tell them something. You know, like when they're in the middle of classes, for instance.

Over here, most people make minimum wage, which is € 385.90 a month. Add that to the fact that every parent can't have a kid and not give him a cellphone (I think they're gonna start implanting them into the womb soon), you can add to the list of basic necessities (water, gas, electricity, web access, television, home phone, cellphones for both parents) the kids cellphone. One more monthly bill. But remember, that's not a problem. If you need money, you can get credit. They give it to just about anyone these days.

If it only ended here... there have been cases of parents complaining about teachers not letting the kids answer phone calls in class. I mean, when a parent calls, it has to be important. The kid must answer right away, or else, they'd never get a phone, right? Why can't the teachers be reasonable about these things?

By the way, considering that a kid's skull is not well formed until about age 6 or something like that, the possibility of low level radiation from antennas causing brain cancer is a tad higher... but wait, nop, they don't cause cancer. Specialists from Nokia, Sony and Motorolla have said so countless times. I think some Phillip-Morris guys nodded their heads too. (I may be wrong about this, it wouldn't be the first time. Once I thought I was wrong and turned out to be right, so...)

So, if you have a kid and don't know what to give him, buy a cellphone. At least the other kids will tell their parents and everyone will know you can afford it. Just buy the top of the line, state of the art, blingued-up one. I mean, you're not gonna say no to something your kid asks of you, right? that would be almost... responsible!

Defining child pornography

People are idiots.

No news flash there, but I'll try to be more specific now. People who make laws regulating child molesting and pedophaelia are idiots. First, I'd like to point out that I think all sorts of pedophiles should be tied by their balls to the back of a truck and dragged through a gravel road. Taking advantage of those who can't defend themselves is the lowest of the low. Fucking cowards.

Still, like all forms of deviation or freakish/stupid behaviour, psychologists (for which there should be some rope left after they're done with the pedophiles) define it as an illness. You know, junkies are sick, child molesters are sick, serial killers are also just the result of a bad case of the flu, I guess. I'd consider it an illness only from the fact that, like the flu, common cold and cancer, can cease to present symptoms if you apply a short dosage of lead, flying at high speed towards the pacient's head.

Still, it's an illness. Let's go with that. If it's an illness, there should be a cure. In this case, maybe some sort of psychiatric help, along with constant monitoring and shit. Hell, there may even be cases where, in order to tone down or even out of the will to not hurt anyone, he may turn to other representations of children in sexually compromising positions. You know, drawings. Although it's not exactly a normal person's cup of tea, it's pretty much harmless. No child was mollested and he gets his kicks. Kinda like the guys who fuck teddie bears. Freakish yeah. Harmful or illegal, nop.

Still, drawings of children in sexually compromising positions are ranked up there with actual photos or videos and deemed illegal in a wide variety of coutries. One could argument that, yes, it may lead them to search for more real representations of their depraved desires. Or even that it indicates they have a problem and should get professional help before they hurt anyone. But still, can one make an argument that they are hurting anyone? Would you really care if all pedophiles did was drawing and looking at drawings of kids? Was there really any harm being done?

I think people should pull their head out of their ass and start passing laws by the principle for which they were made, to protect people. Not to protect their own concept of what's decent (and most of the times, what's "christian" - ah democracy, what a load of crap). As long as anyone being hurt, I think people should be able to do as they please. Even if it is a form of drawn kiddie porn. Next thing you know, you'll wanna put people away because of their ideologies. Been done before.

Oh, and if you are one of there people and agree with me because you have tons of drawn kiddie porn and shit... well, you're a sick fuck. Just because one defends your right to do something, doesn't means he agrees...

Fucking pathetic drawn kiddie porn addicted losers.

Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas... in jail!

Santa Claus should be locked away!

This may seem out of the blue, but if you analise the evidence against him, you'll see that I'm right. To enumerate...

Santa Claus is known by many names. Now, most people who go by many names usually have something to hide, for instance, con artists. Now this Santa Claus, aka Saint Nicholas, aka, Kris Kringle, aka, Father Christmas, if nothing else, seems to be hiding something.




The fact that he's isolated in the North Pole all year (probably to escape extradition) demonstrates some sociopathic tendencies. When he comes to civilazation, what does he do? Gets some kids to sit on his lap and enters houses through the chimne, with a bag full of goods. Paedophilia and Breaking and Entering right there.

Other than his attraction to kids, we can also expect sexually deviant behaviour involving elves. After all, the man's in the North Pole all year. I'm sure he has a couple of harassment complaints on him.

The whole flying sled thing is another issues. Other than the fact that most animal defense associations probabbly have a problem with the way he forces his reindeer to do his bidding, the whole "visiting all the houses in the world" (except Africa, I guess) is a clear violation of airspace (national and otherwise). I'm guessing he doesn't even have a flying licence.

The whole toy business also smells like some kind of mafia money laundring operation. If you add this to all previous evidences, I think it's pretty clear that the fact that he is allowed to go free is a statement to the fact that the justice system doesn't work and that there's no international cooperation when it counts.

Santa Claus must be stoped!

Working overtime...

Had a series of recent discussions about work and jobs in general with some people.

It's a basic fact that this country always had a shitty economy. This is due to a series of factors, number one being the fact that every fucker out there would sell his soul for a cent more of profit. This of course translates into short-sighted investiments, crappy compensations for workers and a high work schedule. We still work 40 hours a week and make about €2,30 an hour as minumum wage. Note that minimum wage here is not just a reference value, is what most people get paid. If it was 30 cents an hour, that would be everyones salary, if they got their way.

This, of course, leads to low consumer power, low morale and eventually little to no optimism about the state of things. Eventually this just makes the economy stay as is, shitty. I do believe they even labeled it a chrisis. In any case, everyone falls further in debt, there's no progress and little will to change. So, hearing people ranting about how important their job is to them pisses me off.

I'm not talking about important as "I have to support my family" important. I mean "I love my job and it's a significant part of my life" important. If jobs were supposed to be a good thing, you wouldn't require some sort of compensation to do it! Still, there are people who put their jobs above all else. They are generally the same people who put out their chest everytime they say "I'm an engineer/doctor/lawyer/etc". Why do people have to "be" what they do? Why are there people that'd prefer to work overtime than to spend time with their families? Where's the quality of life in all of this?

Just today I was talking to an aquaintance and he was saying that he was now doing a job that had been previously done by three people. Had to do overtime because of it. Overtime for which he wasn't being paid. He mentioned also that he was expected to do just that. If he didn't work overtime, they'd probably fire him. So he just wakes up, goes to work, goes home at about 22:00 and sleeps. Wash, rinse, redo! Over and over again. All that for a handfull of coins by the end of the month. All this and the possibility of getting sacked whenever they feel like it (he's still on a temp contract... after 2 and something years of working there).

I fail to see the purpose of it.


P.S. To all of you who are gonna go on about feeding families ans such, I understand that there are many cases when you have no choice but to submit to such terms. My point is that... the existence of such terms is wrong. Make money to get a car to get to work, a house to live in with out the time to enjoy it because you're out working and clothes to make you presentable when you're at work. Not producing anything of importance, most of the times. There has to be a better way that this. And also... I'm not afraid of a little hard work. I want to work. I just don't want my life to be all but work. And I don't think you should either!