Ideas that'd make the world a better place
A post that doesn't start with one word only!
I've been thinking about stuff that the world needs and that would probably make everyone's life easier. Or maybe just mine, which is all that matters anyway!
Rubber gun cover:
You see, the problem with shooting someone is that it always leaves behind those nasty gunpowder residues. They're traceble and anoying, specially when the person whose brains you're splattering over the wall isn't worth the trouble of getting you into jail. Of course that includes just about everyone. With this invention, you just have to place it over the gun and all the powder stays on the inside. Rubebr must be non flaky so that it's doesn't leave trace either. A great gift for computer helpdesk personel too!
In-uterus bomb:
Forget the chastity belt. With this baby, if the dick going in that pussy isn't near the radio transmiter that sends the ok signal, well... let's just say she won't cheat on you again. May prove falible if chick digs dildos.
Junkie manipulation:
Many would say that a drug addict is also a person, moreover, a sick person. Many would be wrong. Shit, those're probably the same "many" that thought the world was flat a couple of years ago. Truth is, a junkie's just a drain in the social security fund. So why not make the work for the benifit of society? We could use them as farming utensils, cannon fodder (just give them a sharp stick and say that if they take down that tank, you'll give'em crack), natural fertilizer (ok, with a few added chemicals!) or crash test dummies. Of course many more uses can be found, but I'll leave ya with these at the moment.
Old people deodeorant:
Old people stink, that's a fact. Maybe it's because water wasn't invented up until about 40 years ago and they're not used to taking baths (proof tht water hasn't been invented 'till the 1970 is known as "the sixties"). So, old people deodeorant, to remove the cat and rancid food smells. Make usage mandatory.
Inflatable hospitals:
Let's get one thing straigh. Old people don't go to a hospital because they're sick. They go there because they're alone. With the inflatable hospital, you can just stuff all the old people in a waiting room and then make them talk to a manekin. Since these would be cheap, you could have one on pratically every street and that way all the geezers would't take up doctors' time, hospital space, medical attention for those who need it (and are not going to die in the near future) and since they wouldn't use the buses, also save a lot of money on deodeorant!
Children collars:
or all those mommies out there who're just plain incompetent and can't control their 5 year old. You think that slapping the little bitch because he's pulling someone's hair is traumatizing, don't ya? Well, with the kid's collar, you can keep him near by without pissing other people off. Choker model available.
Stupid people seeking mini-missile:
Need I say more?
If you implement any of these ideas, I want credit!
I've been thinking about stuff that the world needs and that would probably make everyone's life easier. Or maybe just mine, which is all that matters anyway!
Rubber gun cover:
You see, the problem with shooting someone is that it always leaves behind those nasty gunpowder residues. They're traceble and anoying, specially when the person whose brains you're splattering over the wall isn't worth the trouble of getting you into jail. Of course that includes just about everyone. With this invention, you just have to place it over the gun and all the powder stays on the inside. Rubebr must be non flaky so that it's doesn't leave trace either. A great gift for computer helpdesk personel too!
In-uterus bomb:
Forget the chastity belt. With this baby, if the dick going in that pussy isn't near the radio transmiter that sends the ok signal, well... let's just say she won't cheat on you again. May prove falible if chick digs dildos.
Junkie manipulation:
Many would say that a drug addict is also a person, moreover, a sick person. Many would be wrong. Shit, those're probably the same "many" that thought the world was flat a couple of years ago. Truth is, a junkie's just a drain in the social security fund. So why not make the work for the benifit of society? We could use them as farming utensils, cannon fodder (just give them a sharp stick and say that if they take down that tank, you'll give'em crack), natural fertilizer (ok, with a few added chemicals!) or crash test dummies. Of course many more uses can be found, but I'll leave ya with these at the moment.
Old people deodeorant:
Old people stink, that's a fact. Maybe it's because water wasn't invented up until about 40 years ago and they're not used to taking baths (proof tht water hasn't been invented 'till the 1970 is known as "the sixties"). So, old people deodeorant, to remove the cat and rancid food smells. Make usage mandatory.
Inflatable hospitals:
Let's get one thing straigh. Old people don't go to a hospital because they're sick. They go there because they're alone. With the inflatable hospital, you can just stuff all the old people in a waiting room and then make them talk to a manekin. Since these would be cheap, you could have one on pratically every street and that way all the geezers would't take up doctors' time, hospital space, medical attention for those who need it (and are not going to die in the near future) and since they wouldn't use the buses, also save a lot of money on deodeorant!
Children collars:
or all those mommies out there who're just plain incompetent and can't control their 5 year old. You think that slapping the little bitch because he's pulling someone's hair is traumatizing, don't ya? Well, with the kid's collar, you can keep him near by without pissing other people off. Choker model available.
Stupid people seeking mini-missile:
Need I say more?
If you implement any of these ideas, I want credit!
posted by Cash at 8/03/2006 09:01:00 AM
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